Boys may be boys

But not, it seems, in the classroom. If both researchers and parents recognise that boys tend to be more active, impulsive and physical in their learning, what can you do to support your son’s education? 

Over the last ten years, research has confirmed what parents of boys have known all along: many boys are more active, physical and impulsive than girls. Attempts to change their behaviour or force them to comply with overly sedentary systems of education are counter productive.

Parents, teachers and schools are now beginning to understand and accept boys’ masculinity. Rather than trying to quash it, educators are tuning into the way boys communicate and learn and are finding ways to enjoy and use boys’ energy in the classroom.

What to look for in a school

If you think your son might need an approach to schooling that acknowledges the particular needs of boys, there are many things to think about and ask to help guide your choice of school.

What programs are available in any given school will depend not only on the people at the school but also on their knowledge, attitudes, skills, time and resources. Bear in mind that this is not a conflict between boys and girls.

Helping boys to stay focused, using programs and techniques that support their favoured ways of learning, can in turn help girls too. Programs that use a wide range of teaching and learning strategies to actively engage children benefit all.

Classroom relationships between girls and boys and teachers improve and everyone benefits from a more stable, enjoyable, varied environment in which to learn.

Whether or not you are lucky enough to have choice of school, you can still ask some educated questions. Knowing the things to look for will help you prepare your son for school.

• A male principal or senior staff member is an important role model for young boys to look up to. This person should be more than a figurehead and needs to be regularly involved with the children. Look at how many male staff there are in the school and what positions they hold.
• Find out if any of the teaching staff have attended workshops or conferences on boys’ issues and education.
• Look for education with energy. Passive education contradicts the needs of all young children. For example, mathematics need not always be blackboard or paper work. The principles of counting, shapes, measurement and timing can all be taught through the manipulation of concrete objects.
• Creative teachers invent ways to practice skills that incorporate children’s interest. Practicing ‘sight’ words by writing them in hopscotch squares using chalk and then jumping on them as you read can be far more appealing to some children than writing them in an exercise book!
• Research indicates that because of the way boys’ brains are wired, language and expression can be weak areas. Boys can require extra help to master written language, enjoy reading and express themselves verbally. Ask about extra support in these areas and how early it is available to all children.
• Many boys are not as adept at fine motor skills (ability to move fingers and hands carefully when using pencils, scissors etc) as girls of the same age. Find out if there is a way your classroom provides extra support for children in this area.
• Does the school offer programs or activities that specifically meet the needs of boys? Many girls may be involved in these as well, but they may be designed to meet the needs of active boys initially. Look for these on a school level (eg outdoor education; sporting/musical/artistic opportunities; animal/garden care) as well as at the classroom level (eg small group activity work; hands-on work).
• Information and computer technology can be particularly appealing to boys. Many studies have found that boys engage favourably with computer-based activities. It improves their involvement in learning and enhances self- esteem. Ask what computer technology is available in the classroom and the school, when it is accessible to the children and for what purposes.

There is a huge amount of literature available about boys, their development and their education, much of it easy and entertaining to read. Well known family therapist and parenting author, Steve Biddulph, suggests that another vital consideration for boys’ early education is a later starting age.

Readiness for school

Currently, the age at which children start school in Australia varies from state to state. While there is no right starting age for formal education, parents need to be aware that at age six or seven boys can be six to twelve months less developed than girls. Boy’s cognitive skills, fine motor skills, and social and emotional development often lag behind compared to girls of the same age.

Formal education is not a race and enrolling boys in particular too early can have long lasting effects on their school life. Schools and parents need to accept a more flexible approach to starting school based on children’s development rather than chronological age.

Parents may need to be proactive here. Ask your child’s preschool or kindergarten teacher whether, in their professional opinion, your son is ready for school. You know your child best. Trust your instincts and when in doubt, a further year at home, in childcare or in a transition to school program, may be the decision in your son’s best interests.

Misdiagnosis

One of the implications of enrolling boys in formal schooling too early can be that of misdiagnosis of behavioural difficulty. Boys who are not socially, emotionally or cognitively ready to cope with the demands of formal schooling can react in a number of ways.

Asked to sit still too often and for too long, some boys can become physically overactive with their desperate need to move. Delays in fine motor co-ordination can make drawing and writing difficult for boys, often causing them to switch off with disinterest in these areas. All too quickly, children can be misdiagnosed as learning disabled when in reality we are simply asking too much of them too soon.

What they need is not a label, but more time to mature and develop and a schooling system that is more sympathetic to the needs of boys.

Once your child has entered the education system, try getting involved wherever you can. The schools most successfully serving boys an excellent education are doing it because they have the support of parents, including fathers, and a team of dedicated, willing and capable staff.

Other issues to consider

• How does the school currently involve fathers or grandfathers? What avenues are there for involvement of male family members?
• Do the literacy programs involve texts, books and topics that would appeal to and engage boys?
• What intensive support is there in the areas of literacy and fine motor development and how often is it available? Who provides this support and how early in a child’s education can it be accessed?
• Is there some flexibility for starting age?
• How many eating and play breaks are there in a day and when are they? Where are children allowed to play and for how long?
• What expectations are there for homework? How does the homework load increase with each year?

If things do go wrong

Your child will be at school for up to thirteen years. Somewhere during that time, there’s bound to be a difficult patch and how you manage this with your child sets an example for him about how to cope when things go wrong. Bearing in mind that most changes in behaviour have some background influence, it can be helpful to talk to children privately at home before working together with the school staff in a positive team approach.

• When talking to classroom teachers, begin with a ‘How can we solve this problem?’ attitude.
• Talk to senior administrative staff for a different perspective.
• Find other parents who are dealing with similar problems. They can be a great source of information and emotional support.
• Keep your child involved and talk about what’s happening and how you want to work together to get it right.
• If you suspect your child may have an underlying learning problem, consult with the school and your medical practitioner and access specialist help and support.
• Be prepared to put in some time and energy of your own to give your child any one-on-one support they might need.

By Adele Amorsen 

More information

Success for Boys - Initiative of the Australian Government reporting on the BELS program (Boys Education Lighthouse Schools).

Boys Gender and Schooling - developed by Education Queensland for school communities - teachers, administrators, parents - working to address issues in boys' education.

PBS Parents - Understanding and raising boys - special link about boys and their emotional well being on the respected American public broadcaster website.

Raising Boys by Steve Biddulph, Finch Publishing

Boys in Schools by Rollo Browne and Richard Fletcher, Finch Publishing

Raising Cain: Protecting the Emotional Lives of Boys, by Dan Kindlon and Michael Thompson, Random House.

This article was first published in Australian Family Magazine, October 2007. Updated July 2009.